Stage Fright

A friend recently asked for advice about how to deal with stage fright.  This is what I wrote. 

Sometimes, I feel like there is really nothing you can do about it because the source of it is not entirely to do with going on that particular stage on that particular day.  You are never really upset/worried/anxious about the thing you think you are, right?

A certain amount of anxiety about going on is normal, though, of course and it might be odd if someone did not feel at least something out of the ordinary while waiting offstage for the cue.  It’s not a normal thing to do to walk out in front of a crowd of people (or one person) and do something so intimate and personal as singing (or acting.) It’s unusual, and it takes something extraordinary to do it at all.  Something drives us to do it though.  Maybe think about whatever that is?

I remember the first time (more or less) I went on stage as an adult.  After weeks of rehearsal, finally it was opening night.  I was petrified waiting in the wings.  Then I thought, what would be more embarrassing, to go out and potentially make a fool of myself (just like that time when I was five years old and …) or to flee the theater?  Better just to do it and let the chips fall. We did the first number (“The Boy Friend” from The Boy Friend) and it got a standing ovation and all anxiety was dissipated. I was beaming.  I don’t remember ever feeling anxious (at least not to the same extent) in the rest of the run.

On the other side, I went up on a line in a show I was doing in 2017 and it messed me up for the better part of a year.  Nothing worked but to just power through it.  The only thing that helped was to acknowledge the anxiety, not try to fight it and normally it would fall away the moment I stepped on stage. The preparation took over from there.

On the far side, I don’t recall ever having had any stage fright during Metamorphoses.  I could not wait to go on.  Whatever nervous energy I had was eagerness to get out there and have fun.  I think that was because 2019 was a stressful year and my time on stage was a refuge from that. 

So it’s like you either get haunted by the ghost or you don’t, who knows why, but it’s not your fault.  I guess all you can do is say, hello ghost!

The only other thing I can say is, I remember as a kid watching actors and singers on interview shows like the Tonight Show or David Letterman or whatever and they would say they were terrified to go on, even at that stage in their careers.  These were people who were gigantic stars and they still had stage fright.  I just could not believe it.  But now I do!

Photo credit: whomever took the pictures for the production of The Boy Friend at the Capitol Theater in Olympia, WA in 1990. 

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